Just a Memory
by HurricaneHaley9
Summary: After Eli wakes up from a coma due to a car accident, Clare realizes that he's suffering from severe memory loss. He can't remember anything from his past ... including her. A twist of the new promo 'In Too Deep!
1. Reckless

**Author's note: So, I decided to write one of my own EClare stories;fanfictions since I just love them so much, and this idea popped into my head THE MOMENT I saw the promo for In Too Deep. So I decided I'd give writing fanfictions a try, instead of just reading them. Please, please, PLEASE review! It will be very much appreciated! : ) Okay, now on to the story... I hope you like it! I really do!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi, for if I was, Declan and Holly J would still be together, Bobby would have been killed by some random stranger as karma, and Drew wouldn't have cheated on Alli. **

_**Eli's POV**_

"You promised me Clare, that you'd never leave me," he mumbled into the phone receiver, as he got inside his hearse. Clare has just broke up with him a few hours ago, claiming that he was suffocating her-which Eli, of course, knew was slightly true, nut nevertheless, his attachment to her was to be expected. Eli didn't want to lose Clare like he has lost Julia, and so if that meant following her around everywhere, then so be it. He was only doing it for her own safety—and perhaps slightly for his, as well.

The words kept sending daggers to his heart, every single time he thought back to his last conversation with Clare.

"_Maybe we should take a break," she proposed; her voice was so low, you would have thought she was simply thinking aloud. _

"_W-what?" He didn't think he has heard her right—take a break? Wasn't that just another way of saying 'I want to break up with you'? "What are you talking about?" he murmured incoherently, trying to make sense of this whole situation. Didn't they share a kiss just a mere moment ago? "Wh-what?" he couldn't help but to ask again, his words a stutter—which was a change for Eli, since he always talked with such certainty and confidence. _

"_I just ... I just need some space, Eli." Clare admitted, fixing her gaze on the floor, for she wasn't able to lock eyes with Eli—because she knew that if she would, she would see right through the pain in his green eyes; something that she couldn't bear to witness, something she couldn't bear knowing she was the cause for, because although she wanted some time off, she still cared for the boy dearly, and the last thing she wanted was for him to feel so ... hurt, and broken. She didn't want him to think she has betrayed him; that she has gave up on him. _

"_I-I don't understand... Clare..." This couldn't be happening—not to him, not when he was finally getting better, getting happier. She couldn't very well cause all this pain to him, right when he was starting to fall for her. "Please, don't do this..." he pleaded—maybe she'll answer to his cries. "Clare, you need to think this through. We can fix this. I can fix whatever's wrong. We just ... we just need some time away, just the two of us." he tried to reason, attempting to convince her to take all her words back. _

_At his pleads, Clare got up from the bench seat in frustration, finally having the courage to lock eyes with him—blue on green. "Stop it—you're suffocating me!" she exclaimed accusingly. _

"_Clare, you're being irrational. Please," Eli tried again, as he, too, got up from the bench. _

"_I'm sorry, Eli..." Clare whispered apologetically. "I'm so sorry..." _

A tear fell down Eli's face as he shut his phone. He finally turned the hearse's ignition on, causing his engine to roar. Then, he drove, for driving was the only thing that could possibly clear his head from the excruciating vivid memory.

At first, Eli drove rather decently—at a slow pace. But as minutes passed by, and the conversation kept getting more agonizing, the speedometer increased in number. Although his eyes were fixed on the road, even Eli could tell that he was distracted—too distracted to drive at least. His thoughts kept turning back to Clare, to their first kiss, to their first conversation, to their break-up.

_Why is it that the ones you love the most always end up hurting you the most?_ he thought to himself, as the number on the speedometer neared sixty.

_Is there someone else? Is she breaking up with me to be with someone else? _Eli worried, as the number reached seventy.

_Maybe if I call her again... _he concluded, as he tried looking for his phone, averting his eyes from the road—and not caring. It's not like he was concentrated on driving, anyway.

_Eighty_, read the speedometer. _Ninety_, it showed, when Eli glanced back at it a moment later, fumbling with his phone. He realized he didn't know where he was going, when _one-hundred and five _closed in_. _He heard his phone ring and answered at _one-hundred and ten_. He had difficulties placing his phone to his ear, however; he had difficulties to speak.

_She can't leave me. She just can't... I-I-I lo—_But Eli couldn't finish the thought, because as the speedometer signalled he was driving at one-hundred and fifteen miles per hour, he realized a truck was coming towards him. He dropped the cellphone on the floor, as he turned the wheel as hard and fast as he could, and he swerved, but that was all that he could do.

His last thought was unfinished. _I love Clare_, he has finally come to acknowledge it when he was placed on the ground, his hearse on top of him, barely holding on—barely breathing.

**Clare's POV**

Although she knew that breaking up with Eli was the right thing to do, she still couldn't help but to feel overwhelmingly guilty at the act. The look on Eli's eyes—the ache—was too unbearable to watch, and it kept haunting her every other second these past few hours.

"You promised me Clare, that you'd never leave me." Her voicemail said, carried by Eli's voice—she could almost hear the sadness in his tone. And that, just made the guilt grow all the more.

She figured she would call him—not to get back with him; she meant it when she said she needed some space—but to check up on him. Because although they have broken up, that did not mean that she did not care for Eli's safety, and she knew that Eli was capable of doing something reckless right about now.

She called, and called, but no one would pick up. She hoped he was alright; she didn't want anything to happen to him—that was, in fact, the last thing she wanted. "Pick up, pick up, pick up..." she mumbled to no one in particular. "Please pick up,"

But there was no answer.

Until that is, when she decided to dial again. This time, there was an answer—however no one was there to reply to her. "Hello? Hello?" she mumbled again and again, but Eli never spoke back.

She then heard a spontaneous honk—it was a blaring noise, as if someone was ordering Eli to _get out of the way_—and she heard the phone making odd noises—as if it just fell to the floor. Finally, she heard a crash before the phone conversation ended involuntarily.

Clare didn't know what was going on, but she was terribly frightened for Eli, which is why she dialled once more when the phone shut down. "Eli, answer me!" she screamed frantically, but there was no point—it was obvious that the phone broke because of a car accident. A car accident that involved Eli.


	2. Accident

**Author's note: So, as you can see, I decided to write more of this story, haha. I don't know... I guess I'm just inspired & I was so happy to see that people put this story on their story alert and someone even REVIEWED that I just HAD to write some more! Heh :) So, please, please, please, PLEASE review—it means the world to me!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi, for if I did, Declan and Holly J would still be together, Jenna and Chantay wouldn't exist, and J.T would have never died. **

**Clare's POV**

When Clare heard the blaring honk, then the sound of a car swerving and a few seconds later crashing, and then finally utter silence—unbearable silence—she instantly expected the worst. When she realized that no one was there to answer her frantic phone calls right after hearing a crash, an image of Eli slowly bleeding to death appeared in her mind and taunted her.

She was right to expect the worst, because that was exactly what happened—the worst. After a few minutes of desperately pleading for Eli to answer her calls, and after realizing that he would never, Clare called 911. Although, she didn't exactly know why she did that—it's not like she knew where Eli was, and it's not like she knew if he was actually hurt—physically, that is, for she knew emotionally, he was suffering through excruciating pain ... because of her. However, there was no need to spare the police officer on the line much details, because the moment she mentioned Eli's name and his being in a car accident, the officer calmly told her that someone else—someone who witnessed the crash—already called and that the ambulance was on their way.

With that in mind, Clare quickly called Adam, her voice hysterical when she asked him for a lift and described him the terrifying scenario in a few short words—"_We need to go to the hospital right now!"_ she ordered him. She would have asked her mom and dad to bring her to the hospital and for Adam just to meet her there, but they were away with lawyers, finalizing the divorce.

After what seemed like hours, but was only a few minutes, Adam—and his mom, who was driving—finally arrived. Clare quickly rushed to the car and opened the door rapidly, only to be welcomed by a worried Adam.

"What happened?" Adam asked. Clare didn't have time to explain to him all the details over the phone.

"I'll explain on the way, just ... _drive_!" she exclaimed to Adam's mom rather rudely—but it was all in good intention, and Adam's mom was able to identify that by the tone of Clare's voice. It wasn't filled with deliberate disrespect, but genuine worry and anxiousness. And so, with one swift motion, Adam's mom hit the pedals and drove as fast as the law allowed her to.

When Clare noticed this, she finally let out a breath. "It's Eli," she explained to Adam. "He's been in a car accident. A fatal one, from what I could classify over the phone."

"Wait—_what?_" Adam exclaimed out of disbelief. This couldn't happen—not to Eli, not to one of his best friends, not to one of the only people who accepted him for who he truly was. "How?" he mumbled, when Clare wouldn't give him a reassuring reply, when she didn't even want to look back at him.

"We broke up a few hours ago ... Well, I broke up with him." she clarified, but the words were still indistinct to Adam, because sobs and cries were mixed onto her sentences. "He... he... I should have never broke up with him. I knew so-something w-w-would hap-p-pen... I j-just didn-t think it would be this-s-s b-b-ba-bad." she stuttered.

"Why did you—break up with him, I mean?" Adam asked, although, to be honest, he didn't necessarily expect Clare to reply.

"H-he was suf-suffocating me," she answered vaguely, not bothering to give him a better justification. She didn't need to, however, for Adam was a part of the misfits; Adam knew exactly how emotionally involved Eli was to Clare; he acted as if he couldn't live, if she wasn't with him; he needed her wherever he went.

"Any-w-way-y, I was worried he would do something reckless because of the break-up ... You know how Eli is." The more Clare explained the story, the clearer her sentences and words were, but the harder it was to pronounce them. A lump in her throat was formed by now—one that she attempted to swallow but couldn't manage it. She was fearing the worst again, a vivid image of Eli bleeding to death on the cold, damp pavement forming itself in her mind again. "So, I called him. He answered, but there was no... There was no reply; he wasn't talking." The memory was still so clear in her head, but she didn't want it to be. She closed her eyes, desperately hoping that this was all just a dream—although she knew better than to believe that. "Then I heard a honk, and a car swerving, and then a terrifying crash." she continued, still closing her eyes, as if the act would make it easier for her to tell the story. "And that's when the phone conversation ended." She gulped—finally able to swallow the lump in her throat. Tears started falling down from her glistening eyes, when she ended the story. "I called the police, because you know, it's better to expect the worst, to be ready for anything. They said someone already called, and then ... then I called you. Eli might die, Adam. _Eli_ might _die_." she repeated, confessing to Adam her biggest fear at the moment.

That's when she realized they got to the hospital.

* * *

The moment Clare and Adam rushed to the hospital, they saw Cece and Bullfrog at the front desk. It seemed like they have also just arrived, as if they just heard the news a few minutes ago, just like Adam has. She tried to read the expression on their faces when she called their name, but it was indecipherable.

"Oh Clare... Adam..." Cece said, responding to their call—to their cries. "The nurse just told us Eli's in surgery—his brain is bleeding, and a lot of his bones and limbs are broken, upon other things. She told us to sit down; it may take a while until he comes out—_if _he comes out—, she said."

Clare and Adam nodded in understanding, for they were too unable and shocked to let their mouths speak. They took a seat in the waiting room, and did just that—they waited.


	3. News

**Author's note: So, uh, new chapter. I'm uploading pretty fast, eh? Hahaha. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I really appreciate all the reviews and support you've been giving me—a newcomer. Please, please, please, PLEASE continue reviewing as much as you can. Keep in mind that it keeps me hours (not much emphasis on the plural, haha) to write each chapter and only seconds to review. With that in mind, please enjoy. :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi, for if I did, I wouldn't have left you guys hanging until February 11****th****. D:**

**Clare's POV**

After eleven agonizing hours of waiting for someone—anyone—to offer Clare, Adam and Eli's parents some news, finally a doctor came by. "Family of Eli Goldsworthy?" he asked, looking around the waiting room. Although it was around four in the morning, the hospital was packed. Clare hates the fact that so many casualties happened; that so many people here were worrying for their friend's, their lover's, their relative's safety; she hates knowing there were more like her, still waiting for the doctor to come by. She finally concluded: _She hated hospitals. _

The moment the doctor mentioned Eli's name, Clare, Adam, Cece and Bullfrog immediately stood. "That's us," Cece said, as the rest nodded—even though Adam and Clare weren't technically family to even be _allowed_ to hear these news.

The doctor walked towards them, his face impassive—expressionless, emotionless, indifferent. It was a poker face; one that hinted that the news might be either good or bad, but Clare wouldn't know until the words slipped out of the doctor's mouth. "Hi, I'm Dr. Stevens, Head of the Neurology Department. As you may already know, Mr. Goldsworthy has been in a fatal car accident." He let that sink in for a moment or two before he continued. "There were many severe injuries—such as internal bleeding, broken bones and limbs, upon others. However, what really made an impact was the aneurysm—he came to the hospital with his brain swollen and bleeding. As Head of Neuro, I insisted for him to go to immediate surgery—with good reason. I operated on him, myself. So, you should know, that the best operated on your son, and that we've tried all that we can."

"Well, is he okay?" Clare asked hurriedly; the doctor wasn't giving them much answers, just facts, that they mostly already knew. But the way he stalled to inform them of Eli's condition made it seem as if, he didn't want to share the news because they were ... bad.

"Well, he's not dead." Dr. Stevens stated. "...But he might as well, be."

"What do you mean by that?" Adam mumbled, almost inaudibly.

"Mr. And Mrs. Goldsworthy," the doctor said in a tender voice, as he turned to face Cece and Bullfrog, "your son's in a coma, and we don't know if he'll ever wake up."

"Wait—w-wh-what?" Cece whispered vulnerably, her eyes starting to glisten.

"I'm not saying he _can't_ wake up, but it is a _possibility. _I've seen many of the same conditions with other kids Eli's age, and some of them never came back from, well... their slumber." You could see that the doctor tried to be as sensitive as he could, but there was this certain look in his eyes—a glint of despair—that hinted that most cases like Eli's never ended well. "We'll leave him attached to the IV for three weeks, but after that—if he doesn't wake up—you'll have to decide whether you want to keep your son on life support or not." he explained rather quickly, as if trying to get away before the tears threatened to fall down the family's cheeks. Clare reasoned that it was probably hard for a surgeon to deliver bad news to people every day; it was probably harder than pronouncing the time of death in the Operating Room. "If you'd like to see him, he's in room one-oh-four." And with that, the doctor left, ready to put this terrible moment aside, and perhaps _save _a life and deliver _good _news this time.

Clare couldn't help it when the tears started to run down her cheeks. _This is all my fault_, she thought. _If I haven't broken up with him, he would still be here._

"This isn't your fault, Clare." Cece stated, as the tears fell down her tear ducts. "Just know that. You could have never predicted this car accident." she finished, as if reading Clare's thoughts.

"W-w-would you mind if I w-went to see-ee him f-f-fi-first?" Clare stuttered, one foot over the other, as if ready to run towards Eli's room the moment his parents gave their consent.

Bullfrog and Cece nodded, giving Clare permission to go.

* * *

There were so many things Clare wanted to tell Eli the moment she entered the hospital room—even when she knew that he couldn't really hear any of them.

Therefore, she started from the top of her list: "I'm sorry," she simply said. "I should have never broken up with you. I should have just accepted the fact that you were just always there, because you were afraid to lose me. I should have just dealt with it as a girlfriend, than as a coward. I should have never give up on you." she finished; the more she spoke, the guiltier she felt, regardless of Cece's words. "I wish you could be awake to hear this... Right now, I feel like I'm just talking to myself, practising what I need to say over the mirror... Please wake up." she begged, to no one in particular. "I'll be the best girlfriend in the world, if you would just wake up... Please, for me, Eli. I-I-I love you," she finished, finally admitting it to herself that she did, indeed, love him. She has never said the words before, but what was the point of saying them if there was no one there to listen?

She left the room in despair when she realized that Eli won't wake up any time soon. "Just don't die, okay?" she pleaded before finally taking her last step towards the corridor and closed the door. Walking towards them, Clare gave Cece and Bullfrog a look signalling that she was done with 'talking' to Eli. She sat back down in the waiting room, determined to stay there until—_if_—Eli woke up.

That was not the case, however. Three hours later, Clare saw her mother and father rushing towards her, attempting to console her before obliging her to get into the car and go home to get a good rest before going to school the following day. The accident was on a Saturday—of all days.

The very picture of her mother and father working together to help Clare overcome this would have probably uplifted the mood of any other child who was suffering with their parents' constant arguing and shouting and threatening of divorce, and Clare would have been happy, if it weren't for the picture of Eli, lying on a hospital bed—peaceful, serene and vulnerable as he was, in the peak of death—etched onto the back of her brain.

_Eli might die_, she remembered telling Adam on their way to the hospital. _Eli might die, _the possibility seemed more probable after every hour that passed by.


	4. Awoken

**Author's note: So... this is like the longest chapter I've ever written for this story, for now. Haha. It was really hard to write this chapter, because at one point, it was written in Eli's POV, but it was when he didn't know his name, so I couldn't very well mention his name either. I always had to replace it by pronouns. Sounds confusing now, but ... just read it and you'll get it. :) I skipped like two weeks of the story because who really wants to read depressing chapters in detail where the possibility of Eli dying is the main topic of discussion? We all love him too much to let ourselves think of his death, haha. **

**I would like to add that although I've been updating a lot and frequently, it will not always be like that. I have big tests coming up this week, so my updating pace will simmer down a bit, haha. **

**Anyway, please, please, please, PLEASE review. It means the world to me. The more you REVIEW, the faster I'll upload the next chapter! ;) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi ... but I wish I did. **

**Clare's POV**

Time without Eli has been unbearable. She constantly felt lonely, even though she wasn't alone—Adam, Alli, her parents, and even KC made sure of that. The guilt was never-ending; hypothetical thoughts and situations kept swarming into her head, pangs of culpability kept hitting her stomach spontaneously and tears always threatened to fall down her cheeks, even when she was at school. During the two weeks and a half that Eli was gone, no one caught Clare with a smile—she couldn't even muster a fake one. It didn't stop there, however. Cece and Bullfrog signed the life support papers, signifying that if Eli wouldn't wake in two days time, not only would Eli be considered brain dead, but he would also stop breathing. There would be a funeral the following week. But Clare kept forcing her mind to avoid that troubling thought; she couldn't bear thinking about Eli's funeral, knowing that the accident—no matter how many times people told her it wasn't—was partially her fault. It was ironic, in a way. She remembered Eli informing her in his hearse that he used to feel the same guilt towards his ex-girlfriend's death. Back then, she was just another ignorant voice, telling him that: _It's not your fault._ Now the roles were reversed; Eli was on the verge of dying and Clare was the one who was getting all the consoling comments. _How did Eli go through it all? How did he face all this guilt? _She kept asking herself. Sure enough, Clare remembered that he never has; that there was always a part of him that felt like he didn't deserve Clare for what he has done to Julia.

Clare felt like she was breathing underwater. She felt vulnerable, helpless ... hopeless. She felt like she was getting suffocated—but this time, it wasn't because of Eli; it was because of _herself_ and what she had brought upon Eli and all who loved and cared about him.

School ended, which signalled the arrival of a new weekend. Any other day, she would be ecstatic for the time saved for herself, but this was the weekend that would determine Eli's fate: life or death; will he wake up, or will they take him off life support? This was the weekend that would determine Clare's destiny, as well: Will she live a life full of never-ending guilt by her lonesome, or one with Eli, the love of her life, by her side?

This weekend was not just a usual weekend, it was _the _weekend, and she would be spending every waking—and sleeping, for that matter—moment at the hospital room, beside Eli's bed, praying to God—if there was a God; she was starting to doubt Him at this point; why would an omnipotent God choose to cause this undeniable and excruciating pain to her?; she was starting to understand Eli's decision for being an Atheist—that Eli would wake up.

* * *

**Eli's POV**

The radiating sun was blinding him when he woke up from what seemed like the longest sleep he has ever taken; he rubbed the sleep from his eyes—although it seemed like he has slept for days—which was just preposterous; he was probably exaggerating in number—he still felt a little sleepy, a little tired. His muscles felt sore and numb, and he felt uncomfortable, as if he hasn't stood up for what seemed like ages; he carried on by stretching his arms and legs over the bed; it felt good. He looked down at himself and realized that he was wearing a hospital gown; _where did that come from? _he thought. Curious, he scrutinized the room that he was in, because surely this wasn't his. For one thing, the room was abnormally blue, which bothered him, because that caused more light to get in. He concluded that he didn't like the color blue. He then went on to check the time; a clock hung on one of the walls of the quaint room—it read seven a.m. Finally, his eyes fell on the body of a girl about his age. The girl was sleeping—her face serene—but he could still see that the girl was beautiful. He wondered what color lay behind her eye lids—was it a simple brown? An enticing green? Or maybe the serene and calm color of the ocean—the peaceful way she slept seemed to hint that the latter would win. Yet, in the back of his head, he couldn't help but to wonder: _What was the girl doing here? What am I doing here? Where am I?_ And as the questions kept passing by, they got to much simpler ones, such as: _What's my name? I forgot my name. What's her name? Do I even know her? _

He couldn't even remember his own name. _What was going on_? he thought.

That was when he caught the girl's eye slowly opening. He was right with his guess—her eyes were blue. _You have really pretty eyes_, he wanted to tell her, but he was afraid that if she really was a stranger, he would scare the girl off. However, something in the back of his head told him that he gave that comment to the familiar blue-eyed girl before, he just didn't know when—or _how_ for that matter—given that he has never met her in his life. It was as if it was a déjà vu feeling, but he shrugged the thought off.

The girl started to smile in what seemed to be like relief, gratitude, and happiness. He didn't dare say a word.

* * *

**Clare's POV**

When Clare woke up that morning, her eyes were greeted with familiar green ones. At first, she thought it was just a figment of her imagination—something caused by sleep deprivation, perhaps. But after squinting her eyes a few times to see if she was dreaming, she acknowledge the situation for being what it really was—_real. _

_Eli is awake,_ her mind couldn't help repeating as a smile etched onto her face. It was modest and unsure at first, but as seconds passed by, and the more she stared, the smile grew bigger, wider, to the point of nearly reaching her ears. "Eli!" she burst in excitement, as she pounced on him to give him a hug.

"_Ow_," he groaned, holding his shoulder in pain. It seemed as if he hasn't fully recovered from his broken bones and limbs.

"Oh, yeah, sorry. I forgot you were still a bit tender from the accident." Clare blushed a little as she realized that Eli was still numb and sore from the accident. She made a side note, ordering herself to be careful the next time she touched him.

"It's fine, just don't ... hug me again." he said, still wincing in pain. "At least, for now."

For a moment or two, the room was quiet. Clare was unsure of what to say to him—there was just so much on her mind that she needed to let out and confess before she called the doctor to inform him that Eli was okay. And Eli just seemed out of it—too dazed to start a conversation.

* * *

**Eli's POV **

_Eli_, she had called him. _Eli. _

_Was that my name? Was it short for something? _he kept asking himself.

The room was awfully silent as _Eli_ pondered about his name, among other things.

He has learned three things since the blue-eyed stranger has woken up: The first was that she apparently didn't consider Eli as a stranger, but somewhat more of a friend. She wouldn't have attempted to hug him if that were not the case. The second was that his name was Eli—whether that was short for something, he still did not know. And the third was that he overcame some sort of accident, which lead Eli to confirm his theory that he was, _in fact_, in a hospital room.

His mind went over the new information he has achieved, as if repeating the facts, so that he wouldn't forget them.

"Can you say it again—my name. Please," Eli whispered to the girl, while breaking the silence. He had to make sure it was his real name; he didn't want to be wrong.

"Eli?" the girl asked in confusion. "Why?"

"Can you pronounce my _full_ name, please? First and last." he asked in favour.

"_Elijah Goldsworthy._" she answered, nonchalantly. "Eli, what's going on?"

Eli shook his head, letting the new information sink in. Still, the name didn't ring a bell. _No name rang a bell. _Something was wrong with him, that much he knew. The look of confusion and uncertainty in the girl's eyes hinted that. "Can you call the doctor?" he finally figured it out. "I think I lost my memory."


	5. Amnesia

**Author's note: I had to read a bunch of stuff on the brain and amnesia to write this one... Heh. T'was interesting. : ) Anyway, as always, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and that you REVIEW! Your reviews mean the world to me. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi. –sad face- Imagine I did though, omg. Fgdhdjhffd. Haha. K. **

**Clare's POV**

"What do you _mean_ when you say you think you lost your memory?" Clare asked, in disbelief. Surely, Eli has lost his _mind_, and not his memory. He was acting quite scary at the moment—being absurd and a bit delusional. She knew that Eli was capable to pull this stunt as a joke, but this was a bit over the line—pretending he lost his memory. What did that even _mean_?

"I _mean_, I think I lost my memory." Eli repeated, rolling his eyes at Clare, as if in annoyance. "Just call the doctor, will you?" he sighed in impatience, attempting to take off the wires and tubes that were glued to his body.

Clare merely nodded; this wasn't like Eli—to speak with such arrogance and edginess. Usually, the boy would make a sarcastic and witty comment, or he would say something cunning with a smirk plastered on his face. But, in _irritation_? And, at _Clare_? Never. Not in a million years.

Eli was taking this joke too far—that much she knew. Then a thought crept onto her head, one that proposed that Eli was telling the truth, that he _has _lost his memory. Nevertheless, Clare rapidly shook the thought off—such a thing was an impossibility, a one in a million chance, a preposterous idea.

She left Eli's room in search for Dr. Stevens, Cece and Bullfrog, and Adam. Maybe Eli was still a bit spiteful and upset about the break-up. Maybe that's why he was acting that way. Odds were, the moment he acknowledge his parents' and Adams's presence, Eli would turn right back to his sarcastic—yet, genuine and sweet—self and apologize to Clare for his rudeness; and then—just _maybe_—Clare would apologize, too, for breaking up with him, and they'd get back together . . . because the mere thought of losing him completely, these last two weeks, made her realize how precious Eli was to her.

* * *

**Eli's POV**

"What's wrong?" a doctor in his mid-forties asked, when bursting into the room. Behind him, stood the girl from earlier, a boy about his age, and two other adults who seemed very much stuck in the past, with their rocker hairstyles and leather jackets.

"You're awake!" the boy exclaimed, in eagerness. "You're awake!" he said, again. At the statement, everyone else—other than the blue-eyed girl—smiled enthusiastically at the very thought. _What happened_? Eli wondered again.

"Uh, ... yeah. I guess I am." he said, awkwardly, while scratching the back of his head with an index finger. Turning to the doctor, he answered his question. "I, well, I—I, you see... I think I lost my memory." he admitted, causing the doctor's sincere smile to be replaced by a frown. Everyone else's smile was still in place, however; they probably didn't understand the gravity of Eli's statement.

"What do you mean?" the doctor asked, as he stepped closer to Eli. _His name is Dr. Stevens, _Eli remarked, looking at his name tag.

"Well, when I woke up, I realized that I didn't know what my name was. I had to ask that girl," Eli said, averting his gaze to Clare, and then back at the doctor, "for it. She said it was Eli."

"Do you remember _anything_ else about yourself?" the doctor asked in worry. At his tone of voice, everyone turned their attention to the conversation, realizing just how grave the discussion really was. Their ears were perked and their smiles were gone, as they stiffly stood in place, intently waiting for Eli's reply.

Eli shook his head. "If it helps though, this morning I woke up to the blinding sunlight, realizing I didn't like the color blue, specifically because of these walls." He hoped it did help; the look on the people's faces told him, it didn't, however. "I guess I'm more of a dark-colored person," he shrugged.

"Eli, stop kidding around. This is serious!" the blue-eyed girl exclaimed; fear was tainted in her words.

"Seriously, dude. This isn't funny. Joke's over." the other boy agreed.

"I'm not kidding." he simply stated, fidgeting with his fingers and concentrating on his black nails; he couldn't look at them—at anyone in this room, really—anymore.

"You mean you don't know who I am? You don't remember me?" the girl mumbled faintly.

Eli shook his head once more. "I don't even know your name. Sorry,"

At what Eli just admitted, the girl burst out the door. He caught one tear falling down her cheek before she left. Before leaving however, she simply whispered, "My name's Clare."

* * *

**Clare's POV**

After regaining her composure, Clare went straight to Cece to ask her what was going on in relation to Eli. With a frown on her face, Cece informed her that the doctor was taking a few tests to see what exactly was happening to Eli.

Clare patiently sat down between Cece and Adam, waiting for the news to arrive. This all seemed too familiar and too repetitive—she had the smallest flashback of the night Clare was sitting in this exact room, with the same exact people, waiting for the same doctor to deliver news about Eli's condition. She hoped, this time, however, that the news would be good ones. She was almost certainly sure, though, that they wouldn't be.

After an hour of waiting, Dr. Stevens finally entered the waiting room, again with an expressionless and impassive face. He headed towards Clare's, Cece's, Bullfrog's and Adam's direction, stating the following in a monotone voice: "After taking a few tests, I've finally found what was possibly wrong with Eli." he turned to Eli's parents, just like he did three weeks ago, and continued. "Your son has retrograde amnesia. It fundamentally means that his pre-existing memories are lost to conscious recollection, beyond an ordinary degree of forgetfulness. Due to the car accident, and the damage done to his brain because of it, your son is unable to recall his life. His procedural memory is intact; Eli can still take use of his skills, such as speaking, writing, reading, driving a car, tying his shoes, dressing up, among all other skills learned. However, his declarative memory—more specifically, his episodic one—is gone, which means Eli can't reminisce on past experiences, or more importantly, his identity or his personal life before the accident. Which essentially explains why he couldn't remember his name, or recognize your faces, back in the hospital room. Also, Eli might have trouble to regain his personality, which means that the way he used to be and used to act—for instance, if he was a funny and humorous boy—might also vanish." At that, Clare couldn't help but to recall the way Eli had treated her back in the hospital room—with such impatience and arrogance, and _she_ thought it was done out of a grudge... How wrong was she to think so. "His semantic memory is also still unharmed, which means that Eli can recall facts from the past, such as 9/11 or Canada's current president, for instance." he took a breath, letting everyone absorb the information he has already shared to them. "Post-traumatic amnesia is usually caused by a head injury, and it is most likely temporary. However, the significance of Eli's accident was rather grave, so it is a possibility, that the amnesia might be permanent and everlasting." Finally, he added one last thing before he left. "Eli isn't destructive or dangerous at the moment, but I do suggest, you stay patient when you attempt to make him remember things. Bear in mind that although this is hard for you, it is ten times harder for Eli, knowing that he can't remember anything about himself or his past, and knowing that he has expectations to exceed. With that in mind, Eli will have to stop by at the hospital every two weeks for the next six months, to check if progress is—or isn't—made. If, by then, Eli still can't summon up crucial events from his past or personality traits—at least, the ones you didn't help or make him remember—then I will finally be able to say with certainty that Eli's amnesia is permanent." With that, Dr. Stevens left, leaving a broken Clare, a sad-seeming Adam, and a pair of vulnerable parents behind.


End file.
